Portrait Mode

May 17, 2017 § 4 Comments

I may be am just someone who is taking his baby steps in learning about advertising. Not even baby steps, I am in that stage of  a child’s life where he doesn’t even know how to crawl, so instead drags his lower body like a slug escaping a salt shaker. In hindsight, I am incredibly disappointed with my mom for not letting me continue that mode of transportation as I believe that would’ve greatly improved girth of the sticks I call arms now.

Anyway, ever since the ever-affable Ellen decided to popularise something that has always existed as part of a lonely man’s photography skills at cinema’s most polarizing non-event, selfies have become the laziest technique used to sell mobile phones all over the world. And not without fruit – let’s take a selfie has become the au revoir of our generation’s social gatherings.

Rocket Raccoon takes a selfie as Mystique (Extreme Left) wonders what the fuck is she doing in this version of MCU.

Just to emphasize how much it has penetrated mobile phone ads, almost all phones being advertised during the IPL showcase superior selfie cams as their major USP. Vivo’s phone, reportedly sporting a ‘moonlight’ camera, showed up on our screens more than the Oscar goof-up involving Moonlight.

In retrospect, a Vivo phone’s Moonlight cam would’ve actually helped here.

And oh, this isn’t just among the Indian crowd. We’ve all seen those ads which try to convince us that the only reason to buy a phone that costs more than a two-wheeler is it’s superior camera quality. From a strictly advertisement point of view, they are brilliant. Fuck, I want an iPhone every time I see one of those. I’d think of it as buying a cheap camera than a costly phone. But I am not here to talk about their advertisement skills.

Honest iPhone Commercial

I have little to no qualification to talk about the advertising aspect of it. Hence the whole babystep blabber in the beginning.

But what irks me is the thin line between a brilliant insight and basic morality that gets blurred while we tread all over it. Instead of a 1000 words to explain what I’m trying to say, I’ll just quote Chobsky, which also happens to be one of the two most favorite passages from books I’ve read:

“I want Sam to stop liking Craig.
Now I guess maybe you think that’s because I am jealous of him. I’m not. Honest. It’s just that Craig doesn’t really listen to her when she talks. I don’t mean that he’s a bad guy because he’s not. It’s just that he always looks distracted.

It’s like he would take a photograph of Sam, and the photograph would be beautiful. And he would think the reason the photograph was beautiful was because of how he took it. If I took it, I would know that the only reason it’s beautiful is because of Sam.

I just think it’s bad when a boy looks at a girl and thinks that the way he sees the girl is better than the girl actually is. And I think it’s bad when the most honest way a boy can look at a girl is through a camera. It’s very hard for me to see Sam feel better about herself just because an older boy sees her that way.”

Okay, that’s a bit too emo. But take away all that honesty and emo shit and boy-likes-girl-likes-another-boy angle, we would be left with that second paragraph:

It’s like he would take a photograph of Sam, and the photograph would be beautiful. And he would think the reason the photograph was beautiful was because of how he took it. If I took it, I would know that the only reason it’s beautiful is because of Sam.

Only here, Craig and the camera’s roles are reversed.

The difference between a lovely girlfriend and a Fair&Lovely girlfriend.

We all make fun of those insane ads which claim to make you look fairer in just 7 weeks. Is it really okay when the main talking about a phone is that it does the exact same shit as fairness creams?


Long lost.

January 4, 2017 § Leave a comment

Maybe I’m past the phase that’s been described here, but those last two lines have been on my mind for almost two years now. Failed at translating this to English though.


Instagram @vendekka.

Caught between two Indias: Tales of two dogs

June 6, 2015 § Leave a comment

When he quit, I thought I’ll miss his articles very much. And then, Sudhish Kamath comes up with this! 🙂



Anyone who wants to understand India or Indian cinema can learn everything – Ok, almost everything – about the different Indias within by just sampling the two releases of the week.

One that defies the notion of India as a poor country by mounting a dysfunctional family drama bigger than the biggest of Hollywood indies in that space. One that shows that no matter how rich, these characters are poor little souls needing our empathy. Oh, yes, we are talking about Zoya Akhtar’s Dil Dhadakne Do.

And the other that shows us the spirited world before the poorest of poor by crafting a bittersweet adventure with an all new cast of raw young actors.

One that shows us that no matter how poor these characters are, they have led a life richer and larger than any of us can even imagine.

Manikandan’s Kaaka Muttai is the single most relevant film…

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Puzzle piece Pat

June 8, 2014 § Leave a comment

This is one of the best pieces I have read. Brilliant analogy. Way to go! _/\_


Hi. I’m Pat. Pat, the puzzle piece. I stay in this huge box with many other pieces, all of us unique. All of us have one goal in common. See, the thing is, the person who bought us didn’t know we were living. He bought around a thousand jigsaw puzzle sets, and thought it would be challenging to try and complete them after mixing us all up. And what made it more challenging? There were different number of pieces in every set. He tried a few times. Then I don’t know why, he gave up and left us to fend for ourselves.

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The Inclusion Principle

December 9, 2013 § Leave a comment

I think I saw her twitter profile while stalking my friend’s brother or something. The bio read ‘Bomb Blast Survivor’ and some other brag-worthy things. I snickered. What’s so great in that, even I had been in a bomb-blast. Well, nearly. On the morning of the 1998 Coimbatore bombings, I had skipped down to my pre.k.g classes, recited the alphabet, and played I Spy, before jumping with joy that we were being sent home early. My uncle had rushed to pick me up on hearing the rumour that there might be an explosion very soon in the surrounding area. On reaching home, I scoffed at the fact that my brother had also returned from school early, then went on to play with toy cars in the bedroom, while my mother watched the sooty smoke-filled horizon with horror from our balcony, as the ground shook beneath us.

Back to her. I followed her anyway, since a huge number of people I was following, were following her too. Now, here’s where I have to introduce to you Mr. SuviKS, my Twitter alter(asshole)-ego. Twitter, with the anonymity it provides and all that, is a great platform to retort and troll people, irrespective of age, gender and social status. Being the jerk I am, I go about replying sarcastically to each and everyone who seem harmless and vulnerable. I have my limits, but it’s still very much different from what I portray myself as to my vicinal social circle. Who’s gonna ask, eh? Anyway, I started doing the same to her also, you know, thinking of myself as some great mokka-king and all that. She seemed to be a good sport, followed me back, replied properly and seemed pretty good. But sometimes, some people keep making you twitch even when the do nothing. I can’t explain that feeling, but whenever I saw her Instagram photos which showed excellent creativity and skill, a small jealousy kept creeping into me. Big deal, I thought. Anyone with an awesome smart-phone can take awesome Instagram pictures. Note: All this while I knew nothing about her. I never for one moment reflected on why I was getting insecure about someone I hardly knew. I never wondered what would happen if the people who know me on Twitter see what a whiner I was in real life. And then, somewhere out of the blue, I saw this video:

Honestly, I just wanted to see what my secret irritant had to tell at TEDx and all. Little did I know that this very video would crush my own egos, change the way I see acquaintances, and stop me from writing “I’m also bomb-blast survivor only” in my Twitter bio. And I also realized none  of these would have happened if I’d simply read the little about.me link on her profile the day I followed her itself. But then, there’s also the possibility that I’d have never tweeted her only, you know, due to respect and all that. Probably I needed it like this, she telling it with her mouth, words landing like whiplashes, rather than me reading and keeping quiet from day one. Looking back, I would want this video to be the one thing I refer to in future as “…and then, one video changed the way I see new people…” to awed press-reporters interviewing me.

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